I'm Just Here for the Millet

Well, here we go.... I am off on yet another venture to get healthy, perky and (please, God, please?!?) dare-I-say, if it is not too much trouble for all the trouble, THIN, too....

As it turns out, I had a run of blood work taken a few weeks ago and it appears I have developed some serious food sensitivities which have wreaked havoc in my system.  The plan:  A rotation of the handful of edible items which are left, one list per day for four days and then back over again. 

I opened up the folder of paperwork with the same kind of eagerness with which you approach a spider in your sink.  "I'm bigger than this is", I scream in my head -- simultaneously cringing, squirming and avoiding ... but, in my classic style, I suddenly become Warrior Princess and go on the attack once I shake off the initial disdain. 

"It's just food", I think, chastising myself for making such a big deal of this ... and then I realize that, apparently, the love of food and ingredients with actual flavor are kind of ... my life.  Oh oh.

This is when I decided that a trip to Mother's Market was in order.  I heard that I could get in and out of this quaint grocery store with everything on my list and that there would be a lot of "helpful people" to point me in the direction of the items on my treasure hunt.

So, still dressed in my professional attire (mistake #1), I pulled into the parking lot.  Suddenly, it dawned on me that I might have been far less conspicuous had I changed into a pair of Crocs and let my gray roots grow in.  Too late:  target spotted, I became the alien that landed on their planet and these folks are a curious breed....

Merrily, I strolled among the organic fruits and vegetables with an ease that made me quite proud of myself.  Yes, I know what strawberries and green beans look like... papaya, not so much, but thanks to the packaging, I succeed in procuring one already sliced open and revealing black seeds (which I am still not sure are edible or not -- I picked "not").

And then ... we came to "millet" on my list.  I demurely approached a hard-working young man who was stocking some form of alternate bread and who was unbelievably eager to stop what he was doing immediately to help me in my search for millet.  Fun fact:  Did you know that millet can be procured in many forms:  puffed, hulled, whole, roasted...?  (Me, neither.) 

Suddenly, I looked around and realized that a convention of helpful folks had encircled me, welcoming me to their community.  My, weren't they awfully inquisitive as they questioned me as to why I was eating this food, and who is my doctor, and what kind of tests did they run, and.... and...  and didn't I know that "xyz" (insert 2,472 ingredients here) will be wonderful for me to try??? 

One Persian gentleman, lurking by the organic almond butter grinding machine, took a particular liking to me -- sharing his wealth of knowledge on millet and thousands of other things I failed to absorb.  At one point, he inserted his suggestion that I might feel better if I lost some weight. 

"Really?  Why that thought never crossed my mind," I spoke inside my head with all the self-control needed to avoid slapping a total stranger.  Instead, I grinned, thanked the gentleman for his suggestions and wished him the best, rapidly turning the corner and running into a 250-lb Chinese woman who overheard the words "weight loss" and perked right up.  She wanted to share her triumph in losing 30 lbs. drinking vinegar three times a day and then sharing the diagnosis of every family member, along with a decade of her life history.

"I'm just here for the millet.  I'm just here for the millet.  I'm just here for the millet."  Eyes on the finish line, I maneuver the wobbly cart to the check-out lane and in the refuge of my home.

Unpacking the recyclable bags (I know how not to offend, after all), my family supports me with lots of cheerful comments about how good this is and how good I am going to feel (love these people).  My daughter informed me that the bird eats millet, just in case I want to share.  Birdy is way more enthusiastic about this product that I was today, day #2. 

My goal is vibrance, to reclaim my inner dancing self.  I am not sure what awaits me on the road, but Birdy and I will eat that millet and at least one of us is going to fly.